When it comes to neurodiversity inclusion, many leaders believe they are doing the right thing: implementing programs, conducting training, and proposing policies that seem to check all the right boxes. However, despite these efforts and these good intentions, neuroinclusion is still lacking, turnover is high and employment disparities persist.

For expert consultants working in the field of neurodiversity, the persistence of the “pet peeves” they repeatedly encounter in organizations reveals a deeper problem: organizations often operate based on myths and faulty assumptions about neurodivergent people. These misunderstandings can derail inclusion efforts and alienate the very people organizations intend to support.

In this article, I address three pet peeves that frustrate expert neuroinclusion consultants and prevent organizations from achieving their goals. These pet peeves pose significant obstacles to creating truly inclusive and thriving work environments – but understanding their roots can help remove these obstacles.

Three common barriers that block neurodiversity inclusion

1: The tale of the superpowers

Most of us have heard well-meaning statements such as because “ADHD (dyslexia, autism, etc.) is a super power”. This seems like a positive outlook, so what’s the problem?

On the one hand, a positive stereotype remains a stereotype, an excessive generalization, and the reality is much more complex. Although one person (perhaps a wealthy person with a strong support system) may experience the benefits of neurodivergence but not the downsides, this is not everyone’s experience. By focusing solely on the perceived strengths of neurodivergence, this narrative minimizes the real challenges neurodivergent people face in the workplace.

Significant harm may also come from the fact that neurodivergent employees may feel pressure live up to unrealistic expectations. Trying to live up to “superhero” expectations is likely to lead to burnout and frustration.

As Cathy Rashidian, an executive ADHD coach from Calgary, Canada, who was diagnosed with ADHD at age 40, says, “ADHD is not experienced as a superpower for everyone – it is is unique brain wiring that takes real work to manage… Superpower talk can overshadow struggles, especially in workplaces where real support is essential. Every ADHD experience is unique.

Yes, neurodivergent talents bring unique perspectives and skills to their roles. Some may choose to call their differences superpowers, as is their right. Others may struggle – and feel compelled to hide their struggles, for fear of not “fitting in” to the superpower narrative. It’s important to respect the full range of neurodivergent experiences without falling into toxic positivity and stereotypes.

2: Benevolent ability

The other extreme of stereotypes is the assumption that neurodivergent professionals always need “special support.” This hypothesis is often associated with benevolent ableisma paternalistic bias that may appear to be an expression of benevolence but which hinders the success of neurodivergent and disabled talents.

Julia Armet, founder of Higher Playbook, a people and culture consultancy in New York, observed that “some well-intentioned leaders approach neuroinclusion with a ‘How can I support them?’ This assumption tends to inadvertently infantilize neurodivergent professionals, thereby perpetuating one-sided relationships. Such one-sided relationships rarely support professional growth and, according to Armet, “maintain implicit biases around neurodivergent competence.”

Instead of assuming they need help and stunting the growth of their employees, organizations should look for contribution and ideas neurodivergent talents when designing working arrangements. Employee engagement is key to creating inclusive work environments that meet both the needs and career ambitions of neurodivergent talent. Ableism and stereotypes have no place in such work environments.

3: The “checklist” myth: expecting a one-size-fits-all solution

This myth also reflects the tendency toward stereotyping. Some managers expect neuroinclusion practitioners or clinicians to provide a “guide” for “managing” neurodivergent employees based on specific labels like ADHD or autism. This stereotypical approach fails to recognize the individuality of each person.

Muriel Van Gompel, coach and consultant from Brussels, Belgium, has observed this phenomenon too often. “Managers often ask for a checklist on how to manage different neurotypes, but this approach is fundamentally flawed,” Van Gompel said. “A more effective strategy is to create a flexible, neuro-inclusive work culture where the unique needs of each employee, neurodivergent or not, are considered, allowing everyone to work optimally. »

Beyond stereotypes: get to know me

Neuroinclusion cannot be achieved by checking boxes or adhering to a single narrative. This requires a shift in how leaders think about diversity, moving away from outdated models and label-based stereotypes, and treating each employee as a unique individual. Being “seen” as a person is an essential foundation of belonging. Without this, any initiative in favor of diversity will only result in increased turnover fueled by employee disillusionment.

The key to building an inclusive and engaged workforce lies in a simple principle: getting to know people. A true understanding of individuals – their strengths, challenges and unique perspectives – is the most powerful tool for dispelling stereotypes and misconceptions.

Of course, for managers with busy schedules, the idea of ​​getting to know employees can seem like an extra task. But it can be seamlessly integrated into the daily workflow.

Here’s how managers can build relationships and eliminate stereotypes without feeling like it’s one more thing to juggle:

1. Practice active listening in daily interactions: You don’t need more time to get to know people. Whether it’s a project-focused conversation, a Zoom meeting, or a brief chat, focus on being present. It’s less about the length of the conversation and more about the quality of the engagement.
2. Observe how employees work best: Rather than scheduling additional “get to know you” sessions, observe how employees work: how they prefer to communicate, approach problem solving, or collaborate with others. This observation, carried out during regular work activities, provides valuable information about their work style and needs.
3. Provide opportunities for contribution and appropriation: When delegating tasks or projects, give employees more autonomy and ask for their feedback. Their choices will reveal what motivates and excites them.
4. Submit “Get to know me”/ » formsUser manuals»: A simple but powerful way to better understand your employees (and lead by example when it comes to sharing) is to use “Get to Know Me” forms for all team members. These forms may include questions about work and communication styles and preferred methods for receiving feedback. Such quick forms would provide much more valuable information than checklists based on group stereotypes. They also help normalize differences and do not require the disclosure of sensitive medical information.

Building inclusive relationships is an essential part of effective leadership. Although using stereotypes may seem like a shortcut, they can often derail inclusion efforts. A better solution is to integrate relationship building into the fabric of daily work and get to know those who are like us and those who seem different – ​​at least until we make an effort to find human similarities.